Children of Various Ages will Deal with Divorce Differently
Some children are so young when their parents divorce that they don’t ever remember them being together. Others are old enough to always remember what took place. They will recall what they were doing when they found out about it and how it affected them. It is important for parents to understand that children of various ages will deal with divorce differently.
This means you are going to need to prepare yourself for what each of your children will understand about the process. For some children it is nothing more than knowing that their dad won’t be living in the same house with them. For others it is a complete change of life from the way they have always known it. On top of all of that, children of the same age group will also look at the divorce process differently.
Understanding the feelings of your children and how they relate to a divorce is extremely important. Very young children, even those that aren’t old enough to talk yet can understand the emotions of people. They can often identify issues such as stress, tension, and they definitely know when their parents are upset.
As a result of this their own behaviors may change. They may cling to one or both of their parents. They may not want to go to strangers. Temper tantrums as well as crying are common. A young child may exhibit changes in their eating and sleeping patterns as well.
Children from about three years of age to around five will be able to verbalize some questions about the divorce. They will often notice that the other person isn’t around like they used to be. They may pose questions such as why the other parent doesn’t go to the park with them or whey they live someplace else.
Children that are from the age of six to about eleven will likely know someone who has divorced parents. They will likely know what the term means. However, that doesn’t mean they are going to readily accept it. Be ready for some changes in behavior as well as some very tough questions.
Displays of anger are very common with this age group as the children are simply overwhelmed by their emotions. They may lack the skills to effectively be able to handle what has been taking place. Do your best to get them to talk about it even if they aren’t sure what they are feeling or why.
Older children who are from twelve and up often understand more about divorce than any other age group. They may blame themselves or attempt to find more detailed answers as to what was taking place. Chances are that this older age group was well aware of some issues in the marriage before the announcement of the divorce entered the picture.
It is very common for children in this age group to be angry at one parent and to want to be a caregiver for the other. Do your best to get your child to see both parents as equals. If you can offer a united front as far as the divorce and caring for the children though it will be easier for them to do so. Children don’t need to be your confidante when it comes to the divorce. Turn to another adult for someone to listen or to a professional counselor.
Children of various ages will deal with divorce differently and parents need to be aware of it. This is going to be a huge change for each person involved. Adults need to get a handle on their own emotions though so that they can focus their energy on meeting the needs of their children.
How you approach things with your children during the divorce process is going to affect them for the rest of their lives. With that in mind work hard to have a relationship with your ex on some level. Even if it is nothing more than a hello and goodbye when you exchange the children, the kids will notice it.
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Understanding How To Care For Your Jewelry
There is really no point in trying to procure jewelry if you have no idea what qualities to look for when you are searching. You should also know what steps you need to take to keep your jewelry in the best condition possible so that it will have a much longer life. The following article is full or helpful ideas for buying and maintaining your beautiful jewelry.
Buy dainty jewelry for slender women, and chunkier jewelry for a larger lady. If your wife is petite, then a tiny watch is appropriate. Buy the same watch for your six-foot tall spouse and it might not even fit on her wrist! Whatever you do, DON’T buy men’s jewelry for a woman! She’ll know the second she lays eyes on it and could be offended.
To help jewelry maintain its maximum possible value you should aim to keep it in a pristine condition. Not only will it look better on you but it will also fetch a higher asking price should you ever decide to sell it. Semi annual trips to jewelry store for regular cleanings will help accomplish this.
When buying pieces of jewelry that are unique, consider trying to buy as much of a complete set as you can. With unique pieces, it may be hard to find other jewelry that is complementary. Buying a complete set of unique jewelry also makes it easy to give each part of the set as a separate gift over time.
If you own gold or silver jewelry be sure to take it off when you shower, sleep or submerse that area of your body in water. By doing these things you will prevent the jewelry from varnishing faster. The beauty of fine jewelry is it’s sparkle and gleam.
Before you set foot in a jewelry store, calculate in advance exactly how much you are willing and able to spend on the perfect ring, necklace, or bracelet. Share this number with the sales associate, who can then direct you toward pieces that are within your price range. Otherwise, you risk falling in love with a piece that is out of your league.
When you are trying to buy jewelry for your girlfriend, get her best friend’s opinion first. It is pretty likely that your girlfriend and her best friend share fashion tips and go shopping together. Her best friend will probably know what styles of jewelry will appeal to your girlfriend, so run your selection past her first. But, make sure if you’re trying to make your gift a surprise, that you swear the girlfriend to secrecy!
If you are an athlete and still want to sparkle with jewelry on the field or on the court, you need to look for items that have small charms and are light weight in nature. You also are better off purchasing items that are pure silver or gold since they won’t irritate your skin when you are sweating.
If you are careful and adhere to many of the tips that you have read here then you should be on your way to obtaining some lovely pieces of jewelry. Now you will know the best buying methods and the best ways to care for these very treasured possessions.
Personal development involves setting goals in order to feel happier and healthier. By using your strengths, you can hone in on weaknesses and improve. Taking more time to do things you enjoy can reduce stress, as well. Read this article for some more tips on how to use personal development to your benefit.
Changing habits can be challenging yet very rewarding in your quest to find balance. If you would like to change any habit, it is important to create a goal and a plan to get there. You also need a way to track your progress. If you wanted to quit eating junk food for instance, a good way to get to this goal would be to save up all the money you saved on junk food any buy yourself a nice reward to remind you of your success.
To get your finances back on track, develop a budget and a plan. Reaching your financial goals can help you to avoid problems later down the road, pertaining to money and your overall well-being. Set a budget for yourself on a monthly basis and stick to it. Once you are comfortable and can pay off all of your expenses, then you can figure in emergency funds and eventually “splurge.”
It can be tempting to vow that we will never do _____ (insert bad habit here!) again, but such a mentality can often set us up to fail. Rather than vowing never again to engage in your bad habit, vow not to engage in it for the next 24 hours.
Personal development means branching out. Why not enhance your knowledge base? After you’ve identified your personal weaknesses, find self-help media that will enable you to combat them! There is a book for virtually any type of self-made obstacles. Audio books are an excellent alternative to those who are seeing impaired. Either way you go, self-help books make a lot of sense.
Create a personal development plan to get the most out of your time and energy commitment. Attempting personal development without a detailed plan in place with your goals and activities almost always guarantees a lack of success because it is difficult to remain focused on a few areas of development without a structured plan.
Realize the trade-offs of saying yes to people. Every time you say yes to one thing, you are, without speaking, saying no to many other things. When you give time to one thing, you take it away from other activities you could have done. Choose to say yes to the right goals in your life and you will automatically be saying no to the less important things.
A great way to improve one’s self confidence is to prescribe to an exercise routine. The positive energy from working out and the rewarding feeling of going to a gym can help one’s self esteem tremendously. Sometimes all it takes to feel better is an improved sense of self worth.
If you are stuck in a job you hate, have no goals, or feel generally unhappy with your life, only you can make changes to improve. By asking for support and setting realistic goals, you can start turning your life around. Remember the tips in this article so you can work on personal development and feel better.
Can Seperation Save A Marriage
Sometimes, married life may become extremely stressful and the couple may find it miserable to live together. When this happens, some couples wish to have a trial separation which may help to work through the difference between both the partners. In some cases, separation is prohibited by cultural or religious rules and they prefer to live apart though legally remaining married. The question is that can separation save a marriage and does it really work?
There two ways of marriage separation, either informal separation or legal separation. Generally, informal separation is what you both agree by a mutual understanding. There is a formal division of the property, arrangements about possession of cars, credit cards and bank accounts. A legal, formal separation is more complicated, permanent and expensive. People undergoing the process of legal separation go through time, pain and expense.
Generally, separation is not the first step to save a marriage. Many couples first try to participate in marital counseling which may help to work through the differences. Some couples seek out an advice from the friends, family or religious leaders. Many people are successful in resolving their marital problems after participating in couple retreats or marriage seminars.
Along with these options or after trying these options, the couples choose a trial separation. Now, you will wonder can separation save a marriage; is it an appropriate way to save a marriage? Yes, it may be helpful as it gives an opportunity to both the partners to experience the feelings of being separated before taking any final decision. The major advantage of trial separation is that it is reversible.
During the period of trial separation, you may go through marital counseling, think over it and then take the final decision. This separation period gives you ample time to think about your differences, your mistakes, problems in your married life and ways to resolve them.
An absence of daily bickering and conflicts may be an effective answer to the question can separation save a marriage. Due to a lack of proximity, there is absolutely no chance for conflicts. Both the partners get enough time to think over their marital problems. Most of the marital problems originate from fear, ego or stubbornness. Resolution is possible as long as one partner wishes to keep trying.
The main purpose of trial separation is to develop the skills of resolving the problems before moving back together and working on improving the relationships. For a couple, a planned separation can be a good time to think, to analyze, to reflect, to calm down and cool off. It helps to make thoughtful decisions and thus work to save a marriage.
In some cases, separation may be unplanned and there may be no plans for marriage counseling, no tentative time-line for separation and no guidelines agreed about seeing others. Hence, before you think about separation, talk with each other about the individual goals of separation. Both should be ready for seeking individual and joint counseling during the separation period.
The answer to the question ‘can separation save a marriage’ lies within the person himself/herself; you need to realize how important your spouse is in your life and how life may be without him/her.
Getting good advice while pregnant is essential for you and your unborn baby. You want to have a pleasant pregnancy, and you can. This article will give you some tips for making wise choices throughout your pregnancy.
Don’t put on too much weight while pregnant. Gaining too much weight can cause health problems for your own health later. Around 15 to 30 pounds is the proper amount of weight a normal-sized woman should gain in pregnancy.
Write a journal about your experiences through pregnancy! This will give you a place to write down the mundane and the sublime. Write down new things you notice and things that worry you! This will be a great tool for remembering things to ask your doctor about and it is something you can pass down to your child or their significant other as they prepare for your grandchildren.
Buy new shoes. As your pregnancy progresses, the extra weight will throw off your center of gravity, putting additional pressure on your feet. This can cause both fluid retention and flat feet. Purchase some comfortable shoes that give you good support; they will alleviate some of the previously mentioned concerns.
If you are seeing a doctor for anything, you need to tell them that you are pregnant. Some of the tests that they perform at the doctors office can be harmful to a pregnant women, and they will skip these for you. Even if there is only a small chance you could be pregnant, you need to speak up.
A great thing that you can do, in order to have a healthy pregnancy, is to educate yourself. This is very important, especially to women who are pregnant for the first time. This can be done by reading books related to pregnancy and in the long run, will help not only when laboring but also, when preparing for it.
Your pregnancy means the decisions are yours. Just because someone in your office or a distant relative doesn’t believe that you should drink coffee or lift something heavier than 20 pounds doesn’t mean they control your pregnancy decisions. Talk to your doctor and make your decisions with them. Ignore unsolicited comments from others.
Use alternative treatments for illnesses. Over-the-counter meds can potentially harm your fetus. Lots of natural remedies, which can treat nausea, heartburn, and constipation, can be found online. You may ask a doctor for some tricks to safely combat these issues.
Take pictures during stages of your pregnancy that you can later share with your child. Pictures of what you looked like during pregnancy will delight your child. You can add notes about your feelings, hopes and dreams to go along with the pictures you take to chronicle your journey.
Your unborn baby shares in everything you do so it is important to choose healthily. Good planning and organization is essential so your baby develops optimally, while you enjoy your pregnancy. Hopefully this article has given you some great tips for making healthy choices during your pregnancy.
These days, more people than ever are considering cosmetic surgery. While the prevalence of cosmetic surgery only increases your options, it also means you need to be cautious as you go through the process of a cosmetic procedure. But how can you avoid red flags and potential mistakes? Read on for some great cosmetic surgery advice.
Make sure any doctor you interview has a portfolio of past clients to look at. This can give you a better idea of your doctor’s capabilities and skills. Ask all the questions you can think of, and ask to speak with prior patients to get more information regarding the whole experience. That way, you can determine whether you have found the best doctor for your needs.
After you get cosmetic surgery make sure that you do not touch your face for a while. Even if your face may feel itchy, or you may want to touch it, try to let it heal as much as possible. You do not want to mess anything up so leave your face alone for a little while.
Make sure you understand exactly what kind of recovery period you will be after your procedure. Many people believe they can jump right back into work. While this holds true for minor surgeries, it is not possible to have a large procedure without recovery time. Talk things out with your medical professional beforehand.
There are many times in life when saving money is an important part of a purchasing decision, however, cosmetic or plastic surgery is not one of these times. This does not mean that you need the most expensive surgeon possible, but you probably want to avoid budget plastic surgery as well.
When looking at any type of surgery, you should always be prepared for problems. This is even more true with plastic surgery, as you also have the chance of a botched job. This isn’t meant to scare you off, just as a reminder to have the number of a back-up surgeon on hand.
Prevent complications from cosmetic surgery by eating a nutritious diet and using vitamin supplements when you can. Surgery is always something that takes time to get over, but you need to prepare yourself to recover by making sure your body can do the work it needs to do. Proper nutrition will help.
Speak with your plastic surgeon about any health conditions you may have. It is important for your plastic surgeon to know about your medical problems, as some of them could cause problems with the surgery. Also, be sure to let the plastic surgeon know about any medication you are taking.
You may have some sort of conflict with your surgeon because, they refuse to do a procedure for you. There is probably a good reason for this, and they are looking out for your best interests. Listen to them. If you want, look to another doctor for a second opinion.
Cosmetic surgery is becoming more commonplace, but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing to worry about. You need to do all you can to educate yourself so that you’re able to make smart decisions. A cosmetic procedure should help your life, not hold you back. This article will ensure your cosmetic surgery brings you all that you want it to.
The Rebound: An Emotional Hazard
A relationship is one of life’s greatest gifts and pleasures. The break up of a relationship is one of life’s greatest disappointments and heartaches. Getting over that break up is definitely a lot easier said than done. Many people fall into the trap of trying to get over an ex by starting to date someone new. This is what is called in the dating world a rebound. For several reasons a rebound is not a good idea, as a general rule. The first reason is that usually when people date someone on the rebound, they are trying to replace their ex. The next reason is that if you realize you are not over your ex, you can end up hurting the person you just started dating. Another reason is that moving on with a new person right away doesn’t allow you to truly heal.
The first reason that dating on the rebound is not usually a good idea is that when you find someone new, you have a tendency to try to replace your ex right away, rather than just find someone to spend time with. You could unwittingly be mistaking residual feelings about your ex for feelings toward a new person. Many times, a rebound relationship will go too far too quickly. You might find yourself in a serious relationship before you realize what is going on. A quick and immediate serious relationship right after the demise of a serious relationship is definitely not a good thing.
Another reason rebound relationships are an emotional hazard is because if you realize that you are not over your ex and want to end your new relationship, it can wreak havoc with the feelings of the new person you are dating. You have thus proceeded to, whether intentionally or not, break the heart of your new companion. Leading someone on when you are still hooked on or hurt from another relationship is definitely not a nice thing to do.
One more reason to take your time getting back into the dating scene is that most people need time to heal after a long term relationship ends. Moving on immediately can be emotionally unhealthy. It is always a good idea to immerse yourself in spending time with friends and family that care about you, but moving on to a different dating partner may not be the best thing. Besides spending time around people who care about you, get to know yourself as a single person. You may have been part of a couple for a long time. Get to know who you are as an individual again.
For these reasons, it is clear that dating on the rebound is not a bright idea. There are many things that can go wrong when you jump straight from one relationship immediately into another. Instead of rebounding into a relationship that may not be healthy, stop, take a deep breath, and spend some quality time with yourself. Think about when you think you will feel comfortable in a new relationship. Think about whether you even want another serious relationship in the near future or whether you want to spend time with many different people for awhile. Think about the kind of person you would want to be in a relationship with. Just take time out for you instead of getting trapped into the emotion hazard of rebounding.
Seek Marriage Help from the Right Sources
If you need marriage help, don’t make the mistake most people do. Don’t talk to a member of the opposite sex about it unless that person is functioning in a professional capacity.
For example, a woman believes her husband doesn’t give her as much attention as he should. She should never talk to a male coworker about the situation even if he is considered to be a dear friend. If he is sympathetic to her and they grow closer, more marriage problems are sure to follow. Depending on the workplace, conversation about the woman’s situation might even be misconstrued as sexual harassment which is never appropriate in the work place.
The best person to discuss marriage help with is your spouse. If that just is not possible – either because your spouse is not willing or because there is a chance you might be harmed for trying to talk about your problems and concerns – talk with a trained professional. Visit a counselor or minister to talk about your marriage problems. They are trained to look at situations objectively and know how to maintain your confidentiality.
If you do not have a minister or know a counselor, you can find one discreetly by looking at your local phone book. Search under “counseling” or “marriage counselors” to find several to call. Some communities may even have counseling services free of charge for some situations. If you have a close friend you can confide in, ask if they have heard anything about the counselors you find. At work you can always pull that “a friend of mine is looking for a counselor. Have you heard of any?” trick.
If the advice you receive from the minister or counselor does not strike a chord with you, go somewhere else. That does not mean that if the advice is not what you want to hear, to leave it behind, however. When you seek help for your marriage, you need to be open minded enough to accept that some of the responsibility or blame may be your own.
Remember, the first step to solving any marriage problem is to seek help. If you and your spouse both agree, try going to a counselor together. The professional may prefer to see you individually after an initial meeting with the two of you together. If you are both willing to find marriage help, you will need to be accommodating and adaptable as you work through your problems and the counseling process.
Expressing Your Love Through Service
A client of mine told me that she had been making food for a friend of hers who was very ill. “I find that my heart opens and I feel so happy when I am doing something for someone else. I need to do this more, but I don’t know what to do.”
Doing service is a powerful way to open the heart and fulfill the soul. Those people who do service know how much joy they receive from giving to others. The more inner work we do to fill ourselves with love, the more our heart overflows to the point where we may feel compelled to help others.
There are many forms of service and we each need to find the way that works best for us. There is no right way. We can serve by helping one person, such as being a Big Brother or Big Sister to a disadvantaged child, or we can be of service by helping whole groups, such as raising funds for environmental projects. We can offer our time building houses for the poor, or we can offer money. We can choose to be of service to people, animals or Mother Earth. Your service may be in being a loving parent to your children, helping a friend in need or being a loving mate who supports the other’s highest good in many little ways.
Doing service is a matter of discovering your passion and then offering your time and love. You might have a special interest in protecting the environment, stopping child abuse, helping the homeless or caring for the dying. You might offer service through your creativity, creating beautiful drawings, ceramics or quilts to donate to charitable causes or give as gifts. Tuning in to your feelings of what brings you joy will lead you toward knowing how you want to be of service to others.
Steve discovered his passion for helping the elderly when his father became ill and was in a convalescent home. A hard-driving businessman, Steve was surprised to find how joyous and fulfilled he felt when he visited his father and brought his humor and compassion to the other elderly at the home. Being with the elderly was so satisfying, Steve decided to cut back on his work and spend more time at the home. He had discovered what makes his heart sing.
Toni had always loved animals. One day she discovered that there was a wonderful animal sanctuary not far from her, a place that took in animals no one else wanted. Toni started to volunteer there and found that it brought her great joy to help maintain this loving sanctuary.
Work, too, can be service. When you experience your work as helping people and you love doing it, it is service, whether you are a hairdresser, a teacher, a physician, an auto mechanic, a therapist, an attorney or a bus driver. While you get paid for your time, no one can pay you for the love you put into it. Love is always a gift that comes through you.
In fact, anything you offer that expresses your love is service – your time, creativity, encouragement or a warm and caring smile to a hassled store clerk. Service is not only expressed in specific works but also in your intention in each and every moment. Have you ever smiled at a stranger or offered a compliment just because you noticed something in him or her that caught your eye? When was the last time you said how much you appreciate someone? When your heart is open to others, service can be a way of life.
The practice of service does not have to be done only on an individual level. It is possible for whole families to participate in service projects. Rather than relaxing around the house and watching TV together, you can participate in a local environmental or social project. Families who do service together generally maintain a higher level of values and unity than those who do not create the time for such activities.
Each of us needs to find the service that excites us, enlivens us and fills our heart with joy as we express God’s love through our actions. Giving for the pure joy of giving feeds the soul. We love God by loving the children of God and serving them in any way we can. It is through service that we can truly grow spiritually. Through service, we are confronted with our issues and given the opportunity to practice our lovingness and expand beyond what we think our limits are.
Do you or someone you know suffer from depression? Hopefully not, but the odds are good that all of us will be touched by depression at some point in our lives. There are things you can do to help. This article is intended to provide some tips for dealing with this serious problem.
If you are facing depression at sub clinical levels you may want to try some over the counter remedies. For example grape juice and St. Johns wart have both been shown to have a positive impact on the mental welfare of their users. It is also cheaper than the more common prescription therapy.
If you are suffering from depression, take a realistic account of your life now, as well as, your goals for the future. If you believe you ‘can’t be happy until’ you have the ideal relationship, or higher income, or the like, then look at what is really important! Ask yourself if you “